Showing posts with label victim. Show all posts
Showing posts with label victim. Show all posts

Friday, June 5, 2015

Take a leap of faith



TAKE A LEAP OF FAITH & YOUR WINGS WILL APPEAR

 From childhood, I have always planned everything.  I wanted to leave nothing to chance.  I even made list for my list.  Than I few years ago I decided it was time to begin my long awaited dream of opening Annabelle's Haven.  A long term haven for women & children of domestic abuse.  Oh I had charts, lists, folders but God decided to see if I had faith.  You see I always thought I would be building Annabelle's in Florida.  I have lived here 60 years, my children & grandchildren are here, my friends & church, therefore, why would I not build my dream in Florida? Well here is where God laughed at my plans.  One day as I was mediating I got Annabelle's Haven needed to be in North Carolina. OK that is a pretty state BUT...and I just put it out of my head and continued with my plans.  The problem was I could not begin my plans because everything I did try seemed to be  blocked. Finally one day I thought I will just look into North Carolina.  I called the Women's Council of North Carolina and learned there is a desperate need for my vision especially in Yancey, Mitchell, Madison counties.  These three counties are very rural and low income which is one of the reasons their domestic violence is so high.  That day I decided I would trust God and take that leap of faith.  I moved with my husband leaving my dear children and precious grandchildren, friends, family and church.  Has it been easy? No, but as I took that leap of faith God has given me my wings.  These mountains have embraced me and filled me with wonder.  I have not soar YET but I am truly learning to fly with trust.  I have not gotten our finances to build but my husband and I have brought 6.5 beautiful acres for Annabelle's Haven.  We have got all the architectural plans and we are a 501c3 nonprofit.  We have spoke to so many wonderful caring people who have volunteered to teach the women to make soap, learn how to cook, to make dog runs, to make quilts, to teach them gardening.  The list can go on and on.  I took my leap of faith and it has been a wonderful flight and I have faith that soon my dream will soar.
"Take the first step in faith.  You don't have to see the whole staircase, just the first step"  Martin Luther King

Faith is the bridge between where I am & the place God is taking me"
                                          Pinterest
"Jump & you will find out how to unfold your wings as you fall"
                                        Ray Bradbury

"Why not go out on a limb? that's where the fruit is"  Mark Twain
"Courage is a love affair with the unknown" Osho








Friday, May 22, 2015

$37 BILLION DOLLAR BAND AID


$37 BILLION DOLLAR BANDAID




Domestic violence cost more than $37 Billion dollars a year in law enforcement involvement, legal work, medical and mental health treatment and loss of productivity of companies.  All these billions spent yet the results are showing domestic violence is a epidemic problem.  In the report from
RELATIONSHIPS IN AMERICA REPORT, They state " we believe that the reports of domestic violence have indeed increased."


When we hear 4,000 women die each year due to domestic violence, 1-3 female homicide victims are murdered by their current or former partners every year or 1-3 women will experience domestic violence, 75% of male abusers were abused as children, we need to realize the billions spent are not working or fixing the issue.  It is just putting a very expensive band aid on the issue!  Our domestic abuse centers have their budgets cut to the bone.  And start up money to open transitional or long term care for domestic abuse is almost nonexistent.  We need places like Annabelle's Haven that will help the women to heal in a safe secure environment.  The women will be given the tools required to thrive in the world including education, counseling, job readiness, life skills, and parenting skills so they can not only survive domestic abuse they can thrive.  As these women and children heal they can be the change that will help end the cycle of domestic violence.


Band aids are good but healing and empowering the women and children affected by domestic abuse is so needed.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

LOVE IS NOT SUPPOSE TO HURT

                                            


                                                   LOVE IS NOT SUPPOSE TO HURT




Love should be without restrictions
Love should be trust without fear
Love should be without demand
Love should accept me for who I am


There is so much hurt in this world from bullying, racism, violence, war.  We should not have it  in our love life!  Our home is suppose to be our safe haven.  But very often it is where one finds the deepest heartache.  Sometimes we have to give up on people not because we no longer care but because they don't care.  Love will never hurt you but a person who does not know how to love can hurt you.  One of the worst part of being abused is the betrayal.  The one who was to honor and protect us is the one who is harming us.


We need to educate men that they are to love and protect not hurt their partners.
And hitting is not love, mind games are not love, and controlling is not love.  Our churches, schools and governments need to address these issues. We also need to educate and remind women that God did not create them to be abused physical, emotionally and mentally.  All women and men are to be loved, cherished and protected.  We also need to start with are children so they understand it is not alright to bully or abuse another human or animal.  We need to change and that change must start with each of us. We need to understand God did not make a mistake on us.  We each are worthy of the very best.  We each are worthy of a safe, secure loving home.  We each must be the change we wish to see in the world. 


Love is not suppose to hurt.  Love is suppose to fill us with joy!












 


CELEBRATE THE COURAGE OF THE WOMEN

... triumph, of living in fear and hiding … Women of Courage interview

                                           CELEBRATE THE COURAGE OF THE WOMEN







Nelson Mandela wrote " I learned courage was not the absence of fear- but the triumph over it"

Women who leave an abusive relationship have great courage to leave and to go into the great unknown.  I am so proud of each of these women. At Annabelle's Haven we need to continue to celebrate these brave women as they go through their healing process..  Weekly we will discuss their accomplishments big or small. Oprah once said " The more you praise and cultivate your life the more there is in life to celebrate"  And I agree, we need to continue to focus on the blessing entering the women and children's  lives.  By weekly sharing their accomplishments and their blessing others will hear and hopefully realize they too have a lot to be grateful for.
                                 Past is gone, Future may never be
                                 God's present  is where our healing will be 

kids-at-play





Children the Silent Victim of Domestic Violence



                                  

Studies show millions of children witness domestic violence annually.  These children also experience trauma from the physical and verbal abuse that transpires in the home.  Children raised in domestic violence homes are often at risk in a number of ways: post-traumatic stress syndrome, failure to thrive syndrome, depression, discipline problems, falling behind in school, nightmares and sleep disruptions, and many more.  As the children become teens there is antisocial behavior, school truancy, substance abuse and violent or abusive dating relationships.

Annabelle's Haven  twofold concept is the healing the women and the children affected by domestic abuse.   Children counselors will work with the children in conjunction with the mother's counselors.  This will help the mothers better understand what the child has gone through and how best to parent the child.  Our children counselors will use age-appropriate strategies to help the child express feelings about what has happened and learn to deal with those feelings.  The children will know that their family is in a long term safe & secure environment at Annabelle's Haven.  The major emphases of all the programs are to increase the child's sense of physical and emotional safety and to develop self esteem and strong social skills. 

It is easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult.  We therefore must change the cycle of domestic abuse starting with our children. We need to  give them back their childhood.  Children need to feel safe.  Children are great imitators so we need to give them something great to imitate. At Annabelle's Haven they will see, hear and know how precious they are and how they are worthy of the very best life has to offer. Healing our children will help break the cycle of domestic abuse.
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQpUKxu8m14